Re-programming Series – Your daily affirmations – part 4
The previous self talk mini series article in the my brilliant kidz re-programming series discussed how to implement the personalised self talk program. This is part 4 of the self talk mini series and discusses how a self talk program can apply to our kids.
Implementing a Self Talk program for children
There are a number of questions that come to mind when thinking about this:
Should we apply this to our children?
We are looking for ways to make our kids brilliant. The whole point of this is to help and reinforce our kids’ positive actions and thoughts in order to achieve being brilliant.
What issues does doing this cover? Firstly, by introducing an activity such as this, it helps to create a positive environment where children can pick up and get used to positive habits, thought processes and actions, by becoming a daily part of your family’s life.
Secondly, you have to work together with your child on this – the effect of this is to strengthen the bonding between you and your child, which in turn nurtures trust, confidence, friendship and respect.
I know from my experience, whenever I have spent time with my children on an activity or project, especially if you can give your child ownership, it has enhanced my relationship with my children. It also brings out a maturity, focus and self confidence in them.
Thirdly, they will be reinforcing either consciously or sub consciously, positive traits that will result in them taking the next step up.
How would you implement such a program?
The chances are that your kids are not going to keep a diary or sit down and analyse – it unlikely that they will be able to understand this process, especially if they are very young. You can create a self talk program in one of two ways:
a) Create a program for them, watching and looking out for the negative aspects.
The way I would do is to create a personalised self talk program as described in previous articles, and record their self talk onto an MP3 or other recording equipment, and than playback this to them when they are asleep at night.
b) Your kids might be old enough to be able to speak to them selves – Again you create the program as mentioned in the above point, and speak it with them a few times, until they are confident to speak it themselves. This is good practice for your children, not only giving them confidence, but also reinforcing the positives far better.
You will need to also think about a system of reward – rewarding success is a huge motivator. When do you recognise their successes and what rewards do you give them? Extra play time, a special meal….? You will need to try a few things to see what works. My suggestion is to give small but frequent rewards for many small wins, and a large special award for bigger successes – for example – great results at school tests or exams, getting onto the football team, tidying up their room….etc
You need to remember that this only one tool to help your children, and must be used in conjunction with other strategies. A holistic approach needs to be taken – for example -looking at your children’s dietary needs, spiritual needs, financial intelligence, creativity and problem solving……We will be posting more on each of these at mybrilliantkidz.com.